You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
