honey bunches of taint.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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