i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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