If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
