so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
