he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Randomize