Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
