ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
