I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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