we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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