THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
