Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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