Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
its liver damage thursday
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize