9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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