I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Randomize
