No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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