I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
