my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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