She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
