so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Randomize
