After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize