I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
