Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
