All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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