so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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