Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
