honey bunches of taint.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
