in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
