I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
