I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
