Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
