I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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