It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
