I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Randomize
