my sisters under your porch take her home
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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