Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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