Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I have fence marks all over my body
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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