sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I have already put on my inside pants.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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