Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
