I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
