I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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