He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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