Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
