last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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