i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize