JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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