i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
