Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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