I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
