24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize
